Noah's Ark, Mark 2

Samuel

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In the year 2020, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in Australia and said:

"Once again, the earth has become wicked and I see the end of all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying:

"You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard – but no Ark.

"Noah!" He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed."

"I needed a Building Permit."

"I've been arguing with the Boat Inspector about the need for a sprinkler system."

"My neighbours claim that I've violated the Neighbourhood By-Laws by building the Ark in my back garden and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Local Planning Committee for a decision."

"Then the Local Council and the Electricity Company demanded a shed load of money for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it."

"Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the Greater Spotted Barn Owl. I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!"

"When I started gathering the animals the RSPCA took me to court. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodations were too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space."

"Then the Australian Environmental Agency ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood."

"I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building gang."

"Immigration are checking the Visa status of most of the people who want to work."

"The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building experience."

"To make matters worse, the ATO seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species."

"So, forgive me, Lord, but it will take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark."

Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine and a rainbow stretched across the sky. Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?"

"No," said the Lord, "the Government beat me to it!"

 

Carmel

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And they've done a good job too. But God, in His own time, will restore all things unto good. Let us not get discouraged, but pray and ask for strength to persevere in being faithful to Christ and the Truth. For He said "I am the Way, the Truth and the Life."

 

Betty

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“Many years ago, Mal was given an old piece of paper that had a poem on it about why Noah could not build the ark because he lived in Australia, so he decided to get Frank to narrate the poem that was modified to suit present day government bungling, but it was admitted not much had changed from the original document that was at least 40 years old. When listening to this you will relate to every word and laugh but be aware it's all very true.”

The above quote was written for a country music CD produced in 2004!!! by Frank Gallen & Mal E Bull (Underground Mutton Studios)

I’m curious where you found it Samuel, as ‘Frank’ is my uncle, who is terminally ill and I sure would appreciate any prayers for him.

 

Samuel

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I’m curious where you found it Samuel, as ‘Frank’ is my uncle, who is terminally ill and I sure would appreciate any prayers for him.

It was sent to me by Peter M. (I think you know who I mean as he's from your neck of the woods).

We will include your uncle in our prayers!

 
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